"The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat."

"Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain."

"Why is it when we talk to God we're praying -- but when God talks to us, we're schizophrenic?"

"If love is the answer, could you rephrase the question?"

"I personally think we developed language because of our deep need to complain."

"Why isn't there a special name for the tops of your feet?"

"I'm seventeen and I'm crazy. My uncle says the two always go together. When people ask your age, he said, always say seventeen and insane."

"In critical moments even the very powerful have need of the weakest."

"The way to get on with a cat is to treat it as an equal--or even better, as the superior it knows itself to be."

"I have never in my life learned anything from any man who agreed with me."

"A tart temper never mellows with age, and a sharp tongue is the only edged tool that grows keener with constant use."

"Where they have burned books, they will end in burning human beings. (Dort, wo man B??cher verbrennt, verbrennt man am Ende auch Menschen)"