"'Contrariwise,' continued Tweedledee, 'if it was so, it might be, and if it were so, it would be; but as it isn't, it ain't. That's logic!'"

"The world is so constructed, that if you wish to enjoy its pleasures, you must also endure its pains. Whether you like it or not, you cannot have one without the other."

"Confidence in nonsense is a requirement for the creative process."

"Two people do not have to agree on what is right to be together. They just have to want to be together. If this sounds simple, try it sometime."

"If someone offers to furnish a sure test, ask what the test was which made the sure test sure."

"Whatever else can be said about sex, it cannot be called a dignified performance."

"Good night, good night! parting is such sweet sorrow, That I shall say good night till it be morrow."

"I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her."

"The postman always rings twice."

"A life is not important except in the impact it has on other lives."

"We don't care. We don't have to. We're the phone company."

"No man has a good enough memory to be a successful liar."